Motherhood

“The moment a child is born, a mother is also born.”~Rajneesh

My daughter texted me this picture today. It brought tears to my eyes. This picture was taken January 15, 1996. My daughter is 23 years old and sometimes, I still can’t believe I am a mother. Being a mother is a blessing from above.

When I look at this picture, I remember exactly where I was in life. I was honestly in the worst place anyone can imagine, with an amazing blessing in my arms. My mother, my best friend died 3 months before I had Jaela, I was lost. At that time I just wanted my mom, however I was grateful that I had my grandmother.

Now that I am mother, I understand the pain my grandmother was going through with the loss of a child (my mother). However, I loss a mother and I was miserable . I truly didn’t understand my grandmothers pain, with the loss of a child, now I know. That is unimaginable and beyond comprehension for me.

I remember when I moved with my Grandmother and my room was downstairs, all I can remember is laying in the bed with my baby in the crib crying , waiting for my mother to come downstairs. My postpartum depression was the worst, I thought I was dying. I remember another time, being at my aunts house in her little den and it seemed like I was spinning.

God only knows how I survived any of that. Only through Gods grace and mercy. But I must say that, through all of that pain, suffering, and hurt I raised a beautiful daughter. My sunshine Jaela. I call her sunshine because she has always brightened my day.

While I must say, that being a mother was not easy. I struggled many times, both emotionally and finally but then their is a God who always provided. My daughter never lacked my unconditional LOVE ❤️.

  • I always wanted my daughter to live a better life than I lived and I believed I accomplished that. My daughter will tell you I was a tough disciplinarian with high expectations. Sometimes to tough, however I think she understands now, as her hard work is paying off.
  • I have always been honest with my daughter and I told her my pains and my hurts. I told her Mother’s are not exempt from mistakes, Mother’s are not perfect. It’s on the job training.
  • “To be a good parent, one must remember they too was a child.”~LaShawn Moore

  • Lastly and most importantly :

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