In order to have a good friend, you must first be one. -Unknown
I never thought I would blog about how to be a good friend. But being a friend isn’t easy. And it’s even harder when a person think they are being a friend and they are not.
Friendship cannot be defined because when you have a friend it’s just something you can feel.
Friendship is very important to me because I don’t have a large family. So I am blessed to have some great friends. Even though I may not talk to them often, because life happens, we are all grown independent adults living our best lives. Not the spring chickens like we use to be, our eggs have cracked.
Many of my friends I have known at least 20 years or more, however I have been blessed with some new friends in my adult life. And I truly appreciate those friends. Who says “NO NEW FRIENDS?” other than Drake!
Here are some ways you can be a good friend :
- Listen-It’s always important to have a good ear. Listen to understand your friend and not to respond. Whenever someone calls you with a problem or issue they just want someone to listen. Usually, people already know the answer to their issue. They just want someone to say “I Understand.”
- Never Judge– I have a no judgment zone policy. I believe people choices are their choices. What’s right for you may not be right for me, but that doesn’t mean that it’s wrong. Judgement comes with criticism and that’s never good feeling. Respect other people and their life choices even if you don’t agree.
- Never Compare– Nothing worst than someone who is always comparing your life with theirs. We are friends! We are not in competition with each other. I never forget I had a friend say,” if you get married before me that would be terrible”. Of course we joked and laughed about it, but it was always in the back of my head. There is always truth in a joke!
- Support and Encourage-it’s nothing like the support of your friends. Because you know they genuinely care for you, Whenever I am invited out I always try to attend, because if a person thought of you to ask, you should be considerate enough to come. Encourage your friend to start that business, encourage your friends to elevate that life. Just always be there.
- Be Honest-Always tell your friends the truth, it’s all about tone and presentation but be honest. I also think when being honest, give examples as to how you can relate so your friend don’t feel like you are attacking them. I am a firm believer one can only give honest advise through experience.
There is this book named How to Be a Friend: An Ancient Guide to True Friendship written by Marcus Tullius Cicero seems like a good book to read and one I will purchase.
According to Time.com, the book is filled with timeless advise on friendship and how to be a good friend. One point that stood out to me most was point number two, “Only good people can be true friends:People of poor moral character can have friends, but they can only be friends of utility for the simple reason that real friendship requires trust, wisdom and basic goodness. Tyrants and scoundrels can use each other, just as they can use good people, but bad people can never find real friendship in life.”
Honestly do you consider yourself a good friend? What kind of friend are you?